Time...it's a thing. Time is something we keep track of, something we lose track of, something we squander, something we have or don't have...it's something.
I have had a lot of alone time lately. Alone time is quiet and it makes one think. Sometimes those thoughts are kind, sometimes they are lonely. Being in the thick of a challenging time brings lots of introspection.
I am still trying to make my bedroom a sanctuary. I finally have the set up how I think I want it. A new record player shelf was in order and I took care of that last week. The room is a hodgepodge of furniture and decor, nothing matches, but it is my spot.
I have one sole thing hanging on the walls of my room. You may say it is also alone. There could be something very symbolic in this.
It expresses a very important concept to me, as I am in the thick of grief and adjustment:
This makes me think of a scripture from The Book of Mormon in 2 Nephi 2:25: "Adam fell that men might be; and men are, that they may have joy"
Part of being here on this rock flying through the great expanse of the universe, is to find joy. Joy can be many different things to different people. Here are five things that have been on my happy list currently:
1. My kids. These two humans are my biggest joy and my greatest blessing. They are mine and I feel so blessed to be their mom.
2. Sports. It is playoff football right now. It is the good stuff(even if your favorite team self-sabotages itself) I was able to also attend a Utah Mammoth Hockey game yesterday...being among other fans who bring such amazing energy to the arena fills my soul. Some people find my sports fascination silly. They may even say it is a waste of time. But if things make you happy are they really a waste of time?
3. Vinyl records. This new obsession is interesting. The nostalgia that comes from the needle hitting the edge of a record is hard to describe. The write-ups in the covers, the pictures of the artist, the sound, it is unique and has brought a whole lot of nerd out of me. I love playing them and I love browsing for them in record stores.
4. Weekly(or as often as I can go) religious services. My faith makes me who I am. My faith also helps me navigate hard stuff. The world can be a very scary place these days and the peace, comfort and strength I find in my worship helps me keep on keeping on.
5. Reading and books. I don't read nearly as much as I want to, but when I do allow the time for it, I love the escape the stories within books gives me. Sometimes fiction is superior to reality. I also love perusing books at my local book store. I have some gift certificates to use there in the near future.
*Bonus: Writing. Putting my thoughts down on paper, or on a computer is free therapy. I think I am going to have to be better at coming to this space and getting the creative juices flowing. I keep telling myself it doesn't have to be perfect. So, you five readers, look forward to more posts here. I am committing to it now.
And now it is your turn to share at least three things that make you feel happy to be alive. Did you know that writing down three things that you are grateful for(I dare say make you happy) actually rewires your brain to look for more good things. You are less depressed because of it. It's science; look it up. Comment your things below, it would be fun to have that interaction with you all.