Reflections.

This time of year is extra hard.  Part of this has to do with the indecisive weather, part has to do with needing a break from work.  The children in my school are cray-cray and the adults are just as stir crazy.  This is where baseball comes in.  Baseball makes me happy and has made life more bearable. For my birthday,  I bought myself access to Major League Baseball streaming of the audio coverage of each of the games for a whopping twenty bucks.  This has been the best twenty bucks I have spent on myself in a long time.  Not only can I listen to my Dodgers, but I also get to watch one game a day for free.  Right no,w the Reds are playing the Cardinals in the background on my phone.  Heavenly.  

Lately, I have been doing a whole lot of soul searching too.  Recently, a co-worker's son passed away and I was able to attend the funeral, even though I didn't know him well.  This funeral, like many I have been to in the past, reminded me of how fragile life really is and how I need to be LIVING more.  This young man inspired me to remember to do the things I love more because he lived passionately.  Sometimes that means I have to make the time for the things I love.  One change I have done with that is to get my guitar out and in plain sight again.  I even have learned "Amazing Grace" which was sung beautifully at his funeral.  I also have remembered to ride my bike more and have plans to get it road ready to start riding to work after Spring Break(it will be warmer, I hope!).  He was an avid bike rider and I need to get out and feel the wind in my face more.  We bought a trailer to lug the kiddo around in and Ellis loves it so we will be doing lots more riding in the Ficklin family. 

I also was reminded how I need to be nicer and love people more.  Life is too short to hold grudges, be surrounded by negativity, judge people, and just be unhappy.  I am learning to let go of the unimportant things and to cling onto the things that do mean most.  

Reuben and this little critter means most these days.  And the people in my sphere need me to be a champion for them.  I am trying to be more positive and love those around me more because I am doing no one a favor by pretending to be small and insignificant.  I am important and I have talents to help people enjoy their journey here more.  

So...I have thought a bit about what I would want people to say at my funeral.  The young man's brother said in a tribute:  "If you take anything for what I say, know that he was a good guy!"  I want people to say that about me.  Well, at least that I was a good lady, that I would do anything for others, that I was always smiling and helped make people smile too.  That is what I want to be remembered for.  I want to someday be celebrated and mourned because it will be a while until those people who loved me can feel that from me again.  I want to be known as a kind soul who loved life. (Ellis is also a great example of this to me.  How fun that a little 7 month old can teach us things about life.  He's a happy little dude!)

Most importantly, I was reminded that this life isn't it.  We are connected and will be in each others' sphere on the other side.  This is all possible because our Creator is eternal so it is only realistic to think that we are eternal as well.  We will get to live on and how peaceful to know that it won't be as hard there for us as living in this mortal life can be at times.  And how nice it is to also realize that we can make our limited time here joyful, full and rewarding.  We get to choose to enjoy life!

Cheers to all.

37

How did I become 37 so quickly. I still feel like the young kid I was in college, high school and grade school. 

Here are 37 things I've learned:

1. Dreams do come true. 

2. Prayer is real and produces miracles. 

3. There is a God who knows us each individually and is watching out for us. 

4. Friends are very important. 

5. Happiness is often based on choices and a big choice is often to choose to be happy. 

6. Family is most important. 

7. The right thing isn't always the popular thing. 

8. There are no bad people, Well, at least most people do dumb things but I'm not to judge. 

9. Service not only helps those being served. 

10. Age is relative. 

11. Time does heal most pain. 

12. Life is too short to spend too much time agonizing over work. 

13. Fishing is relaxing. 

14. You can make a huge difference in your own sphere, which ripples into the whole world. 

15. Words are powerful. 

16. You always need mommy, even at 37.

17. Men and women are different, and that isn't bad, it is just how we can compliment each other. 

18. Teenagers are weird but really need us. 

19. Money is definitely not everything. 

20. Work is work. Sometimes it is hard but most the time it is rewarding. 

21. Food is essential and delishious, but can be like any other vice in the world. 

22. Home is whereever those you love are. 

23. Skype and FaceTime help home be anywhere and both ease homesickness. 

24. It is a blessing to have friends that you can connect with after years of separation and not miss a beat. 

25. Being a parent is amazing. 

26. Sleeping is helpful and needed, and should be appreciated. 

27. It can always be worse. 

28. I don't have anything to complain about. 

29. You cannot change or control people. 

30. Marriage is work. 

31. Slamming doors doesn't get you anywhere. 

32. Having your own house(buying) is pretty dang cool. 

33. The sunset is worth making time to see everyday. God is the best artist. 

34. The seasons will always change even when winter feels incredibly long. 

35. Living in the moment is how you should live. 

36. Babies don't keep. 

37. Love is always the right answer. 

There are lots more things I have learned in my 37 trips around the sun, but those are the ones that come to mind today. 

Here is to this trip around the sun being filled with adventure, happiness and lots of love. 

Cheers. 

Fat Tuesday

Hi.  Did you know that once upon a time, I was Catholic?  Yep, that's right, I was.  Around this time of year, the observation of Lent happens within the Catholic religion(and among other Christian Sects as well) and I actually like the whole premise of that observation and I still actually observe parts of it.  The whole object of Lent is to prepare oneself for Easter by fasting from something.  This observation happens during the 40 days prior to Easter with its beginning marked by Ash Wednesday, which is tomorrow.

Easter is actually one of my favorite holidays because we celebrate what Christ did for us and that is laying down his life so that we can be saved ourselves.  I like how Lent prepares us for that celebration and gets us more focused on religion and Christ,  so I have kept this part of my Catholic days with me.

This year, I am going to fast from Diet Coke, and candy.  (I have been toying with sweet treats and soda all together, but I am thinking that I would be setting myself up for failure.)  I have been having a major gluttonous relationship with candy and soda and I think the best way to cleanse myself from these bad habits is to take a break from them.

This year, I would also like to add a bit more to my observation of Lent rather than just giving up something and not thinking about much else.  I have been doing pretty well at my goal of reading The Book of Mormon again by the end of the year.  Maybe I will be adding some other study to the mix about Easter and the Life of Christ.  Any suggestions on what to study?

Well, I hope all is well for each of the five of you that read this blog.

Cheers.

Oh and Happy Fat Tuesday.  Basically, you run around doing all the things you plan to give up for Lent.  I may have a very large Diet Coke today and some Cadbury Mini Eggs(they are my favorite!)

Birthday Week

Hi.  I have a habit of not writing on here.  Oh well...it is the season of rocking and laughing at a cute little nugget of a baby.  (I don't laugh at him while rocking him, that is counter-productive.)

This week I will turn 37...or as I like to say 20-17.  Sounds a bit less like I am getting OLD.  I know, 37 is the new 17 but I am feeling old lately.  I am getting grey hair and am tired all. the. time.  (The tired probably has to do with parenthood and not necessarily maturing.)

I like to celebrate the whole week.  So yesterday, we hung out with my adopted family, The Bills.  It was a blast as always and there was much laughing.  That is free therapy people, btw.

Maybe each day I should do something I love to celebrate being alive and having one more trip around the sun.  Any suggestions about things to do?

Later this week, I will write an inspired post about aging and how awesome it is.  For now, I am going to go pretend that I do not need a nap and watch my kids take a test in Health class.

Cheers.

A little late...

Ellis is closer to seven months but here is the letter I wrote to him around his sixth month mark. 

I sure love him to pieces. He is one cute little guy and has so much personality. He is a people person who doesn't mind adventures. He's starting to cuddle more and more and I love it! Isn't he handsome?

He's so dang big. Now over 20 pounds and is head is in the 100th percentile. Crazy. 

Sometimes that head is too heavy to hold up so he uses our faces to steady himself. 

Dear Ellis-

You are now six months old and have gotten pretty big. Your head is actually now in the 100th percentile and your body in the 60th. You are just like daddy in lots of ways. You especially love to wear his sunglasses and giggle whenever he tickles you. You also smile when he enters the room. It is very special to me that you love him so much. I can tell you both will be the best of pals.  

You have started eating baby food and actually love prunes. I think you're weird for it but it helps your digestion. You're least favorite so far is peas but you eat them anyway, even if they make you gag a bit. 

You are close to fitting into 12 month clothes. We actually have run out of the free clothes and I had to go buy you a new wardrobe in that size. Right now 9 months fit but I suspect it won't be for long because you are growing like a weed. 

You are a social bug. You will smile for all people. My students especially love to talk to you when you come to watch them play basketball. You are still a little squealer but are "talking" more and more.  

You are moving more and more and can roll over. Usually, it's when we put you on your stomach but you have rolled from your back to your stomach a few times. You also love to kick your legs and have started to make it a little harder to change your diapers. You also have discovered your toes and reach for them as often as you can. You like laying on your back and playing the most and talk and squeal when you are on your back. You also think that my feet are pretty hilarious and laugh at them every night when I'm getting you ready for bed after your bath. You are also a stinker and are trying to get your diaper off when being changed. You also even laugh like you know what you are doing! We are in trouble!!

You still think Reno is hilarious and love when I help you chase him around the house. Reno is still a little unsure about you but he licks you when he can sneak it in, so I think he likes having you around, even though he is jealous that daddy loves you more than he loves him!!!  

You are getting good with gripping things and have learned how to throw things. I am hoping this means you will be good at sports. Whenever you get bored with a toy, you launch it across the room. You still love to watch sports and are easily distracted by the tv.  You have also started to pat your head whenever you are drinking a bottle to avoid sleep. You also tap your hands on the table or your lap, and you still love patty cake. 

I still call you a lot of different nicknames but bugs is the most popular followed closely by bugaboo. Sometimes I call you Mister Mist and when you are grumpy, Grumpy McGrumperson. Daddy called you our little Oyster the other day because you made a dry poop nugget. Silly daddy. 

You already have so much personality. You are a happy little guy. Right now you are screaming and playing on the floor near me. You also are sensitive to people. The other day when I was balling over a blog post I was reading while you were eating, you stopped and looked up at me with eyes of great concern almost as to say to me: "What's wrong mom? Everything will be ok." 

You have my heart kiddo. I look forward to teaching you things and to learn with you as well. Your little giggle when I come home from work keeps me going everyday. 

I love you bunches and cannot even remember or imagine life without you!

Love you, 

Mommy