Something You May Not Know About Me:

I have the memory of a gnat.  Of course I have never met a gnat and had the chance to really see how their memory was, but they are so tiny, I am sure they don't have a whole lot of brain space to remember stuff.

I am not so tiny, and my head isn't either...so what is my deal?

I think it is the amazing DNA I have been blessed with...

BLESSED?  Yep, I just said blessed. 

I think my ability to forget has often...

...allowed me to forgive, when I probably wouldn't have otherwise. And the cool thing is that I can             forgive others just as easily as I can forgive myself.
...helped me be less anxious, forgetting stressful stuff makes it less cumbersome, both before it                   happens(I forget appointments all the time) or after.
...left more space for important things in my brain, like all the school mascots I remember, random             singer facts(Lady Gaga is fluent in French), and the ability to drive in the snow.
...let me hide my own Easter basket.

That last one was just for fun.  It is also one of the jokes I used to tell my grandma , who suffered with Alzheimer's.  "Hey Grandma, what is the best thing about having Alzheimer's?"  "I don't know, sweetheart."  "You can hide your own Easter basket."  She would laugh every single time I told her that joke.  My dad didn't laugh once.

I have a friend who often brings up the fact that I don't remember stuff, I forget her name all the time.  Just kidding.  I remember.  I also remember how irritating it is for it to be brought up like it makes me less of a person.  I do not find my forgetfulness as a character flaw.  Sure, it can be annoying sometimes or embarrass me(like when I forget people's birthdays are in February and actually send them a birthday text in November) but I mostly see it as one of my talents. 

Now...what day is it?

I don't forget what day it is except during long breaks from work(Oh blessed Christmas Break) and during summer.

What is one of your "talents" that some may find as a weakness?

Books of 2019

I can hardly believe it either!  44 books in one year, and over 10,000 pages, that's crazy.  It used to be I could barely read one book in a year.  Crank was too long and my longest.  I did mention it yesterday.  The shortest book, Civil War Heroes was actually a coloring book.  On one page they would describe the hero and on the opposite you could color the hero.  I am not the biggest history fan, so a short US History book was a wise choice.  I did enjoy The Light Between Oceans.  Great story line and I could feel like I was on an abandoned island while reading this tale about a lighthouse keeper who gets himself and his family in a bit of a drama by not being 100% honest.  I can see how it is the most popular on my list.  I also loved reading my friend, Morgan's, book.  I am the only person I know on Goodreads who has read it.  It reminded me that perfection isn't possible, but we can strive to become more perfect through the grace of Christ.

Below are the pictures of all the books I have read.  The ones without pictures are: 

The Set Up Man by Nick Taylor

Wisconsin: The Story of the Badger State by Norman K. Risjord

Rocks and Minerals by DK Publishing

Thunder Mountain by Zane Grey

Here are my Top Five Books Read in 2019:

1. Shoeless Joe by W.P. Kinsella- The way Kinsella packed in so many baseball stats and history stories just kept me wanting to read on.  I also love the whole idea of building a field in a cornfield.  Did you know MLB is actually doing it this next season?  Feel free to buy me a ticket for my birthday.

2.  A River in Darkness: One Man's Escape from North Korea by Masaji Ishikawa- This book was both eye opening and heart breaking.  I had read another book about N. Korea's propaganda and was intrigued to know more about a country that keeps its people under-educated and cut off from the rest of the world.  This is a tale of a man who gets trapped in North Korea through the choices of his father who is blinded by the promises of a better life back in his homeland and moves back from China.  The author struggles to feed his family and then eventually decides that getting to China is a better choice than remaining in North Korea.  His journey takes him miles through the wilderness and then through the Yalu River. I will not give away the ending, but really it is a heart breaking but wonderful read.

3.  Big Dead Dawg by Victoria Houston- Houston novels take place near Rhinelander, Wisconsin. My parents lived there for about eight years and my summers spent there were rich in fishing memories and made me love the area.  While reading these wonderfully written mysteries, I am taken back to that land and even to the rivers and lakes of Wisconsin(the three main characters are avid fishermen.). What a wonderful escape and mini-vacation to my homeland.

4.   Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close by Jonathan Safran Foer.  I am a fan of anything that intertwines the story of September 11th and journeys to healing and this novel doesn't disappoint.  A young boy loses his father but solves a mystery that he finds in his father's closet that takes him on a journey through the city and toward healing.

5. All I Really Needed to Know I learned in Kindergarden by Robert Fulghum-This collection of mini memoir stories had me laughing and crying.  My heart was warmed by the life lessons Fulghum shares and I was often laughing out loud by his great humor.  I am excited to read It Was on Fire When I lay Down on It, which I got for free from our school's library purging.

 And Here are My Bottom Five Reads from 2019:

1.  It's How You Play the Game by Brian Kilmeade- I thought I would love a book filled with sport stories from all sorts of well known people, both athletes and famous people, but I think it was just a bit too much and a little too long.  It felt like it took me the longest to get through.

2. The Rough Riders by Theodore Roosevelt- I did love all of the patriotism here, but again history isn't always my favorite thing to read about. Cool story and it actually was an illustrated book so it had amazing pictures. But you really shouldn't read things for the pictures.

3. Think Like a Freak: by Steven D. Levitt and Stephen J. Dubner- I actually loved Freakonomics and Superfreakonomics by the same authors, but this one was a dud.  It could be because they just mainly answered questions from their readers and, of course, the third in a trilogy is often sub-par.

4. I Never Had It Made by Jackie Robinson- I love his story and April 15th, Jackie Robinson Day in baseball, where every professional player wears #42, makes me cry.  This book though toward the end becomes too much of a political statement and a little too whiny.  I think the editors could have helped by chopping the last few chapters.

5.  The Emperor's Soul by Brandon Sanderson.  Sanderson is a local hero here in Utah.  He is a good writer but I just am not the biggest sci-fi fan.  It is rare that this type of book gets me.  I do like the ideas and storyline, but maybe I just re-read it one too many times.

So, what books did you love last year?  Which ones did you hate?  Feel free to comment with your favs and not so favs either here or on social media.

I bet you want to know what I am currently reading too:

1.  Kind is the New Classy by Candace Cameron Bure

2.  Thirteen Reasons Why by Jay Asher

What you reading?  What is your next book?

I won't stop reading, I just am not pushing for 40 books this year!

Reading Used to Be a Challenge!

One of my favorite places in Provo is Pioneer Book.  Every book in the store is a used book.  Almost all of them are in like-new condition.  So you get amazing books for used book prices!  It also is one of the coziest little stores.  I often find myself spending hours perusing the shelves. Like I did today!

One time Reuben asked: "Why do your Saturday walks take so long?"  The answer was simple yet complicated.  I walk 20 minutes to get there, look around for about an hour and then walk home another 20 minutes.  So, those walks often take about two hours.  I love this place.  The cool thing about the challenge is that you get a 50 dollar gift certificate for use in store upon completion.  So, you read books and then get to buy more.  Win-Win!  Today I bought three books and still have over thirty dollars on my gift certificate!

The Pioneer Book Reading challenge is truly a challenge and not just because it was over forty books this past year.  I used to hate reading.  I was slow and reading never got me excited.  But then one day, in my thirties, I discovered that you must be passionate about what you are reading and then you will do more of it.  The book really does matter.  I also learned from a very wise librarian friend that you shouldn't waste your time on bad books because there are too many good books out there!  And the cool thing is that what your friends may like may not be one of your "good" books.  It is an individual thing.  I don't always jive with the New York Times Bestsellers, and that is 100% okay.  Maybe limiting the category books can come from also added to that challenge of not finding what is really my favorite type of book.  For example, one of the categories this year was a book written by an author born more than 100 years ago.  I tend to like more modern stories.  Sorry Faulkner and Steinbeck.  Well, I guess it makes sense for it to be challenging seeing it is a reading challenge, right?

So, here is a little bit about the challenge(I'll do a bit more of this tomorrow, seeing this is getting to be a longer post):

Favorite Three Categories:
1. Book from the Sports section-I chose Shoeless Joe byW.P. Kinsella. It’s the book the movie Field of Dreams is based on. The book is always better than the movie and this is no different. By the way, I chose three books that had baseball in them this year, and I loved every single word!
2. Book from the Science section-I chose The Making of Memory: From Molecules to Mind by Steven Rose. I have found out that I actually love learning about science and especially about the brain!
3. Book from the Self-help section-I chose Flourish by Martin E.P. Seligman. Basically, this book is about the science of being happy. The biggest thing I got from this book is that gratitude actually rewires your brain to produce more dopamine and it also rewires it to find more things to be grateful for. The science points out that you should write down three things you are thankful for daily to get the most benefit. Try it. It really works.

Least Favorite Three Categories:
1. Book with 500+ pages. Eww. That is just too long. I chose a book that was written in poetry form because it was tons faster to get through. Crank by Ellen Hopkins is actually a good read. It’s about a girl who gets hooked on drugs one summer.
2.  Book by an author born over 100 years ago. Like I said a bit too old for my taste(unless it’s Shakespeare!). I chose The Pearl by John Steinbeck. It was short. The end. (And I really hated the ending. I hear many of his books are disappointing like this one.)
3.  Christmas or holiday book. The book I chose was actually quite good: Santa Cruise by Mary Higgins Clark.  It was just was hard because I had to leave it for a last category because I felt I had to read it around Christmas.

Tomorrow I will list my top five favorite books, followed by Friday and my five least favorite books.  I will also include a list of all the books I read last year, just for your enjoyment.  Feel free to ask questions/comment on here.  If you happen to be like my aunt and have a hard time commenting on the blog you can always email me: softballrita@gmail.com or message me on Facebook or Instagram.

Hope the first day of 2020 treated you well.  I just walked to my favorite spot and hung out.  Being off from work really is a dream come true for me.  I am already dreading Monday, but all good things must come to an end so you can have more days off in the future!

I resolve to not make resolutions

Well, Happy 2020.  Do you feel different?  Some people believe it is a new decade, while others say the decade doesn't start until 2021.  What a conumdrum.  

Almost as big of a conumdrum as making New Years' resolutions.  Have you made any?

It seems like everybody concentrates on reslolutions this time of year.  I get it, it's the thing, but does it really need to be? And does it have to be I'm giving up such in such, or I am going to do this everyday?

See, I feel like instead of something being resolute(unwavering), it might be okay to be a little more half-hearted about it. Seems like a weird philosophy, no?  Like: "Alice, why would you be so cynical and give up so easily?"  Well, that is kinda the problem I have with resolutions it's a perfection based kind of thinking. And I am far from a perfect kind of person.  It's like cutting yourself off of a bad behavior cold turkey, or adding a new behavior thinking you won't ever screw it up. And I feel that is setting oneself up to fail.

Have you looked around the gym in January?  Gyms turn into madhouses the first week of January.  And how do they look at th end of January?  That's right, less people are there.   But wait, weren't they resolute?  Determined?  In it to win it?  See, the problem is that to establish habits it does take about 21 days.  And. IT. IS. HARD. 

Don't get me wrong.  I do always feel like the new year brings some sort of magical “I can change my life” kind of feeling.  But in my 42 years of life experience I have learned that sometimes I think a little too big and then I fail big.  I have learned that each day can be a new beginning and that I can refocus daily.  I also think a little bigger sometimes and reflect on my week.  It's a fresh start to do better weekly.  And even further, I often reflect(thanks to my amazing Happy Planner) on a monthly basis.  What did I do well?  What can I celebrate from the last month?  What can I focus on next month to do even better.

See, I am the kind of person who thinks there is a reason that night is different than day.  We get to lay down at night(and if your are lucky get a good restful night of sleep) and reset our minds.  Just the change from light to dark is different enough to be a restart.  And have you noticed that it doesn't just go black at night?  It actually slowly dims to dark.  And in the morning does the sun just turn on like your kitchen light?  Nope, it gradually gets brighter and brigher.  I feel that quiting cold turkey is like turning off a switch, and it isn't like that gradual dim.  I think we need to focus more on the gradual improvement that we can make in our lives.  

I am not saying I am not making goals.  I do have a few but they aren't finite win or lose things.  I have framed them differently.  

Instead of looking at a number on the scale, I want to continue a slow journey to a healthy weight.  Now that doesn't mean that I am body shaming myself or that a number on a scale is good or bad. Seriously, it is just a number.   It isn't a measure of value.  It is a measure of your gravitational pull.  But you see, there are health consequences associated with those numbers.  I want to be able to keep up with my children(and be around for a long time with them) and I also want to give my students the allusion that I am in better shape them them(sometimes I really think that is only me being better at the mind game that is not stopping, even when it is hard.  They struggle with that and start complaining before they even start moving!).  I am choosing to be more conscious of the things I am putting into my body through food.  I am also choosing to be more active and more conscious of it. I want to think about how it makes me feel. I have already started the habit and I feel better when I am doing both! (And a little bit of seriousness here.  I try to eat well 80% of the time. I am a cheat day or two a week type of person and it is working for me! It is a balance)

Another non-absolute for me is to say: "I want to yell less at my kids!"  I could say, "I will not yell at my kids anymore," but in reality I know I will slip.  But I want to be more aware of it and be able to calm myself enough to be more patient and kind as I interact with them.  I will not be perfect right away.  It just isn't going to be like that, but I can conscioulsy do it less and work at it.  It is progress not perfection that I am going for in 2020.

The last non-absolute for me this coming year is getting rid of my diet cola addiction.  Now, I could easily say: "I am not going to have anymore soda starting Jaunuary 1st."  Do you think it would work?  Maybe, but I know that there is still some Coke Zero in my fridge downstairs and I am going to have to wean myself off of the stuff.  I know their are headaches that may come and if they do, I may sneak in a Coke.  Again, this is looking toward progress not being perfect here people.

Okay, well here I am writing a blog post for the first time in about two years.  Guess what I have deemed this year? This ,my friends, is the Year of Writing!  I have been reading lots the last two years with the book challenge a local bookstore holds.  And I really have loved it, but I am not going to participate in it this year.  Rather, I am going to focus on my own writing.  There is a novel to be finished and edited.  I thought writing a blog post everyday in January would pump me up to be writing more often this year.  

So, my friends, look forward to coming here daily(if you like) and reading some of my ramblings.  I love to write and it may seem a bit cocky to say so, but I think I am good at it and it comes easy to me.  So there, take that.  

What would you like to read about this month?  I have some ideas and the first few posts this week will be about the books I read in 2019, but I am always looking for ideas from the people who will probably read these ramblings. So, go ahead, comment below, tell me what you would like to hear about on this here blog.

Oh and by the way: Happy New Year! May you have 20/20 vision this year! (Free puns even? You bet!)

Secrets...

Why are some things just not shared and you have to experience them in order to know about them?  Here’s a little list of things I wish weren’t so secretive in our existence:
1. The fact that miscarriages happen to most women at some point in their life. I think if we talked about it more then women would have a safe place to talk about it. They would know they are not alone and they would have friends to help them through the whole bloody(literally) process.
2. Contraceptives. Sure, I get it, we don’t talk about sex much period and it may be uncomfortable for some people to talk about it, but seriously, when I got married I had no clue about what was available for our family planning needs. It would have been nice to know about options. And seriously, talking about these things will not make kids run around and have more sex. The stats are pretty much the same as they have always been. It’s actually less than 50% of teens that are considered “sexually active.”
3.  Those stats would actually be nice to have known as a teen too. Because of our lovely media, most kids walk around thinking there is something wrong with them because they are virgins. Maybe they would stay that way longer had they known this but if information!
4. That you can use apple sauce instead of oil when baking. You’re welcome.
5. All the stuff that happens in the whole process of pregnancy and after having a baby. Let’s face it all the stuff about procreation needs to be talked about more. Who knew you would bleed for a week after having a baby? Who knew during that time you would have horrible cramps? Who knew that breastfeeding would also cause horrible cramping? Who also knew that breastfeeding is way hard and takes most moms and babies about six weeks to figure it out? Yeah, six long weeks of hurting and frustration.
Let’s not keep secrets, unless you are talking about my flaws. Then go ahead and keep those to yourself.